The evolution of my worry… October 6, 2008

When I was pregnant with Angelina I worried about everything. That she would be healthy. That she would be cute. That I would learn to love her. That I would figure out this whole “mom” thing. That I wouldn’t screw her up too bad. Worry. Not all the time, these were just the thoughts that ran through my mind.  I followed all the rules- no coffee, no lunch meat, no standing in front of microwaves- I did it all the way I was supposed to..in hopes of subsiding the ebbing worry.

 

When I was pregnant with Tyler I didn’t really have the same concerns.  My concerns became…How can I teach him to pee standing up?  I’m not so good at making truck noises… What if he gets my athletic genes (or lack thereof)? Can I love two kids as much as I love my one? How will I love a boy? I get girls…but- boys were a mystery…

 

Now as I sip my latte, and think about the turkey sandwhich I’ll have for lunch, I find my mind wandering…worrying again.   How will I juggle three kids? How can I make sure Ty doesn’t feel the “middle child” syndrome? Can I love another boy the way I love my son? Will he love me like Ty & Lina love me?  …Can I do this?

 

I’m sure that I’ll figure it all out as I go- and a few months from now most of my worries will be subsided- but today my mind wanders…

It was a chilly 70… October 5, 2008

Last night was fun out of the box night. Invited by some friends we experienced a semi-authentic cowboy cookout down at Rawhide.  Complete with a hayride, line dancing (and yes you should see my moves-though I’m pretty sure I almost went into labor out there…), marshmallows around the campfire.  Memories were made- lots of laughing. It was fun to see the night through our kids eyes. 

 

And Lina? Well, let’s just say- she was “money” on the dance floor.  She made friends with some kids and they do-se-doed all night.  It was quite comical. I’m not sure where she gets her love to be the entertainer…but she was bowing and tipping her hat after each song- such a character.

 

Some shots from the night….

Letters from Dad. October 3, 2008

I think I was about 10 when I found my baby book in my closet. I remember sitting on my bed looking at all the pictures, cards, little tidbits of info about me. An unfamiliar feeling began rise up. My first real sense of being sentimental and feeling nostalgic. About 1/2 way through the book there is a spot where the new Mom and Dad write a letter to their baby. My mom’s letter was expressive and loving and sweet-the way she writes- the way she is. Then I read my Dad’s. If you’ve ever met Scott Cameron, you know…he is a man of few words. He writes the same way. There is no fluff. It’s raw and cuts straight to the heart. I can still see myself sitting on my bed tears streaming down my face. Just a kid- reading words of love from her parents.

Over the years my parents have always written to me. Cards, letters, random notes. Just the other day I went to the mailbox to find a letter from Dad. It was a really nice letter. Talking about a project I had worked on that he was proud of my creativity for…etc. It was a sweet letter, made my morning. Then I got to the last line. I’m telling you— he went straight for the jugular.

The last line of the letter read, “You make me glad I was born.”

Of course the tears immediately began to flow and my heart was overwhelmed- I felt the love in those words jump off the page and fill my chest. I made him glad he was born? And I knew he meant it. And I knew that somehow, someway my kids need to feel that kind of love from me. A love that says I’m proud of you. I know your quirks, your flaws, your imperfections- but your life makes mine worthwhile. Maybe I’ll write a letter…

What makes you feel loved?

NAME that BABY! October 1, 2008

We have a few names but NOTHING everyone agrees on and of course we’re still getting flack from others…so I need your top 3 BOY NAMES.  Please leave a comment with a suggestion or two- Not promising we’ll pick your name, but we’d love your input AND BONUS!!!! If we do pick your name- there WILL BE a reward!

How do you do it? October 1, 2008

I’ve been to the Franklin Covey seminars- I love the smell of a fresh planner. I love crossing things out when A1 has been completed…I love looking back and seeing my life prioritized. When I was in the corporate world I used Outlook…I loved the pop up reminders you could snooze…so nothing ever got pushed back too far. I loved sending meeting requests and seeing who could attend. I loved seeing my tasks each time I logged on… I loved knowing what was up. 

When I became a stay/work at home mom- things got a little trickier. Suddenly there was no meeting at 10am or no scheduled lunch break. I was a child left alone in the big city- trying to find my way. And for awhile I tried it on my own. I tried to make lists, schedule myself. I even implemented the Franklin Covey processes and tried using Outlook. But for some reason, in this context it didn’t work the same way. So I’ve found myself on the hunt-looking for the perfect blend, perfect calendar, perfect strategy.  I’m not sure I’ve arrived, but I must say I’ve fallen in love with iCal through MAC. Here is what my October looks like.

Some are more scheduled than others, some are more organized than others…but my question is what do you use to keep yourself on track? And if you’re married, do you have a way of keeping the communication up with your spouse? Share your insight!

 

20 Questions I’m asking myself… September 30, 2008

Well, one of my favorite bloggers once asked her readers to ask her a bunch of questions and she’d answer them in a periodic way…well since most of my 7 readers know me pretty well- there is really not much of a need for that here at metromom.org SOOOOO…. I decided to ask MYSELF some questions. Is that lame? I never promised that I wouldn’t be lame, so today…I am lame.

 

So I’m gonna answer them…and since some of my fellow bloggers have not posted in awhile- feel free to steal these questions and answer them on your own post- I’d love to see your answers!

People I’d like to see answers from: Her, Her, Her, and Her, and maybe Him.  And you too…If you do decide to take the time to do it, leave a comment so we can see your answers!!!!!  

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

Um, is that a basketball under your shirt lady?

2. How much cash do you have on you?

None- at the moment!

3. Favorite Planet

For living? Earth  but I’m pretty fond of Jupiter as well

4. Who told you they loved you last?

My Tyboy - 

6. Where did you live in 1987

Thousand Oaks, CA

7. Your first love: Whats the last thing you heard about him/her?

I heard him say I love you when he walked out the door to take my girl to school.  

8. What is, in your opinion, the worst song ever?

A toss up between Blame it on the Rain or I Would Do Anything for Love by Meatloaf

9. What are you allergic to?

Laundry

10. When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried?

When a friend served me salad with one of her band-aids in it…YUM-O!

11. Do you eat sushi?

As often as I can.

12. Jack Bauer or Sawyer?

That’s a tough one, but I’m probably gonna go with Sawyer since Jack Bauer is usually a captive being tortured or in China or something…

13. City, Beach or Country?

Beach. Any day. Any time. All the time.

14. Last Song listened to?

Banana Pancakes- Jack Johnson

15. Specialty Dish?

I can always whip up some sort of pasta.

16. Where were you born?

Westlake, CA

17. You have one day to spend however you like, what do you do?

Hmm…I’ve been wishing I could take another trip to Kauai and catch some waves in the warm water…and drive with the windows open blasting music and living it up. 

18. What makes you cry?

A lot of things. If you tear up…I will too…

19. Best Ice Cream Flavor?

All Time? Thrifty’s Chocolate Malted Crunch- but usually not available here, so I choose Rocky Road.

20. Favorite Smell?

Sauce cooking on the stove…

Morning Goodness…. September 29, 2008

In effort to make Dave Ramsey proud we’ve been making some adjustments to our budget- watching the outgo a little bit more- sticking to the grocery budget a little better…not heading out to eat “as much”. My husband even signed us up for this club (…and after he assured me it didn’t mean we had to start driving an old beater- I was okay with it). So we’re learning to live on less, add streams of income and keep working towards our financial goals.  It’s a good feeling- and in our community especially, it goes a little against the grain.  This morning I saved us a potential $8 by making the lattes at home!!!  Since I’m not naturally a barista, I turned to good old www.youtube.com to learn how to steam milk properly- and wow- so good!

The Good News September 25, 2008

The bad news:

 

I’m large with child and supremely uncomfortable. 

My husband is gone and has been.

My house has been way too quiet.

 

The Good News?

The Office premieres tonight!!!!

There is a God and He must love me.

Busy Blogging…but not here… September 1, 2008

I promise that I have been blogging…just about every day. Don’t believe me?  Check out:

 

www.marriagechampions.com

www.fuelhealthy.tv  

 

Don’t forget to comment!!!!

 

Things I’ve been doing in my personal life these last few weeks:

• Sending my baby girl to first grade. She loves school, but now homework is in full force. So not fair for me!

• Keeping my closet clean. If you’ve known me for any length of time, this is a true feat! But it really is clean and I’m so happy!
• Baking a bun in my oven almost 33 weeks down…just about 7 to go!  
• Potty training a 3 year old boy! WOW!!!! Solving global warming should be no problem for me after accomplishing this!

Overall life is good. Waiting for the heat to subside, trying to eat without heart burn and dreaming of what lies ahead!

A “Thank You Note” to my Husband August 14, 2008

Too often I overlook the little things that make life so sweet…so I thought I’d reflect…

 

 

Thank you for being my new BUG Buster-you look so cute spraying away.

Thank you for sending me out to get pampered by a pedicure…just because.

Thank you for bringing home dinner last night.

Thank you for your big heart for me and others- it is inspiring.

Thank you for driving your truck (haha…)

Thank you for rubbing out the foot/leg cramps that wake me up.

Thank you for loving  me in so many little ways.

 

I love you.

 

Who ya gonna call?